Day One

Since last night I’ve been offered

  • a fishtank
  • a handjob
  • a quote from Caddyshack
  • a book full of burned Netflix DVDs
  • some internetual gaming stuff
  • nothing
  • money (really, they’re not for sale)
  • 2 dozen golf balls with my face and/or name printed on them
  • a Virgin Mobile ™ phone
  • and posters

…from different people, though- not from one generous packrat. While none of this really butters my biscuit, I wasn’t particularly clear about my biscuit’s choice of spreads, so it’s really my own fault for being so vague. However, I’m going to let my vague sense of simply wanting something stand, and see what happens.

Meantime, let me be clear on a couple of points- they’re not for sale for money. No quiero dinero. I’m sure there’s laws about selling porn that I couldn’t begin to know (or care) about, and I’m not about to violate any of them by dealing in skin. Also, having both my hands (I stupidly forgot to mention that my limbs are all in place), I don’t need a handjob, thanks. The final point is that this is one big trade. I can’t split them up because I don’t feel like having strangers picking and choosing porn. This is 120 porn films, an insta-library that covers a surprising spectrum of the seven deadly sins.

However, I somehow magically made the WordPress Blogs of the Day list. I’m not sure how that happened, or if it means anything, but I like lists. They make me feel validated.

Keep making me offers! I’ll put up the more interesting offers as they come up. And really, don’t be scared to comment.

Heart, TMPP

Published in: on July 30, 2006 at 12:17 am Comments (34)

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  1. On July 30, 2006 at 1:04 am psycovermin Said:

    how about:

    cisco 6130 (ni-2, 2 or 3 flexi cards, some cap, dmt, sdsl cards),

    6A 48V powersupply (new cost me $200usd),

    6 or 7 (forget) 675/678 cpe (no power supplies.. 5v 2a),

    dvd containing all cisco docs/software i have,

    any other related stuff i can find.

    all works, bought it for a job but not useable for said job, so not sits in a pile taking space. i was going to do an e-bay best offer with like a $500 resurve (paid over $700 on it all).

    should be worth 120 porn-o.

    thanks

    Reply
  2. On July 30, 2006 at 1:14 am takemypornplease Said:

    Wow, Psycovermin!

    While I don’t doubt the value of what you offer, I don’t have any idea as to what it is! I’m not very techie…

    Thanks! And mazel tov on your “first comment” status!

    Reply
  3. On July 30, 2006 at 4:03 pm g Said:

    well im from ireland and as u can imagine irish porn isn’t the best, “oh shtick it into me paddy, dont mind your fancy shtuff!”… so i’ll send you my undying gratitude and boxes of irish tasty cereals and crisps (you call them chips) u cant get in america!! or anything else you can think of that is paddy related! dosnt get much better than that! (i’ll pay all the p + p aswell)

    Reply
  4. On July 31, 2006 at 4:47 pm Scott Said:

    Hey. I am the producer of a raido show in Baltimore, MD. The Mickey and Amelia Show. We think this hilarious, and we would love to talk to you on-air about this. We are on the air Mon-Fri from 3-7 PM EST. Drop me a line and let me know if you are interested. Thanks.

    Reply
  5. On July 31, 2006 at 5:46 pm Helvis Said:

    hmmm… well… I could give you the satisfaction that the porn was going to a good home and would be happy here. Oh… and I guess I could send you an assorment of cheeses from around the world… :D

    h.

    P.S. CHEESE IS GOOD!

    Reply
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